⊙︿⊙

[⊙︿⊙]

[muppethole]

the phrases "kill myself" "kill yourself" "let's kill ourselves" are sacred because brands cannot use them. holy in the literal sense

[⊙︿⊙]

[lovemedonlothario]

you know what all those edgy teen dramas with drunk partying in them are missing? the trauma of learning for the first time that alcohol tastes bad.

[lovemedonlothario]

no underage drinking scene will be complete unless a kid takes their first ever sip of wine and goes “what the fuck?”

[thatll-do]

Thank you Shazam for being the only good DC movie

[⊙︿⊙]

[fairycosmos]

i love pancakes, i love emotional music, i love women, i love sunlight coming through the window. etc etc

[⊙︿⊙]

[gxth-jxck]

Allow me to de-introduce myself

My name is [redacted]

[⊙︿⊙]

[zubatman]

i hope y'all are getting paid to lie about how mint & chocolate tastes good together

[islvndprincesa]

Who mans this

[⊙︿⊙]

[safeguards]

when i’m telling a story and a friend interrupts:

[⊙︿⊙]

[roguemonsterfucker]

Current mood: Sad that I don’t have a rich vampire taking care of me financially in exchange for blood.

[⊙︿⊙]

[⊙︿⊙]

[⊙︿⊙]

[1eos]

why do i want to quit every job i start lmao

[mari-animates]

Hot girls shouldn't work

[1eos]

tea...... what im doing is sick nd unnatural

[⊙︿⊙]

[ourexes]

“if you hate tumblr so much why don’t you just delete???”

[⊙︿⊙]

[librabutch]

i love laying the FUCK down and sleeping

[⊙︿⊙]

[snorlaxatives]

do british people really eat beans on toast as a meal

[quiettimeeverytime]

in america is everyone ignorant

[snorlaxatives]

it was just a question damn no need to get hostile go eat some beans on toast

[⊙︿⊙]

[sandmandaddy69]

[⊙︿⊙]

[stridward]

My salary is so shitty 😒

[squidyword]

have you tried the bbq ranch chicken salad from Wendy’s?

[squidyword]

OMG I THOUGHT THAT SAID SALAD